From Paris with Love

From Paris with Love, (not to be confused with Paris je t'aime, the collection of short films) is a 2010 action film starring Jonathan Rhys Meyers  as a diplomatic assistant in France and part time CIA lackey who finally gets a taste of field action when he's asked to pick up the slightly off kilter agent Wax (a bald John Travolta).

From Paris with Love tries to be a comedic action spy thriller with political intrigue and liberal drug use.  Sure, it's got all those elements, but too many ingredients makes this pot of stew messy.  There a number of great lines or funny moments, but they get lost in a plot that is too often boring, confusing, or just pointless.  John Travolta's character is easily the best part of the movie and I wouldn't mind seeing a spin off just focusing on him and his non-kosher way of getting things done.

None of the other characters are memorable in any way, being pretty much generic, one dimensional bit parts, despite the fact that most of them have multiple facets.  How that was accomplished is beyond me.  I'm wracking my brain for anything else to say about this film but despite having seen it just a few days ago, it's already pretty much slipped my mind, which says more than I could write.

There's nothing horribly wrong about this movie, but it is completely and utterly forgettable in every way.  There were maybe four scenes worth seeing and half of them were already over emphasized in the trailers. 

Fans of Travolta, see it.  Everyone else, see it if you really have nothing better to do.  Like watching a better movie.

** (2/5 stars)

Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief

Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief is based on the first book in Rick Riordan's currently popular series which brings Greek mythology to life in modern times.

Percy Jackson (Logan Lerman) is a 16 or 17 year old (though he and the other characters are all around 12 in the book) who struggles in school due to dyslexia and ADHD.  It's not long, however, before he finds out that these are only symptoms of the fact that he is indeed half god.  Too bad he finds out because he's suspected of stealing Zeus's master bolt and had lots of scary creatures suddenly trying to kill him.  Good thing he has his wheel chair bound teacher Mr. Brunner (Pierce Brosnan) and crippled best friend Grover (Brandon T. Jackson) who just happen to be Chiron the centaur and a satyr assigned to be his (junior) protector in disguise.  Anyone see a theme of looking at disabilities in a positive light here?

As the first half of the book flashes by in the blink of any eye we find Percy at Camp Half Blood, frenemies with Athena's Daughter Annabeth (Alexandra Daddario) and off on a quest to save his mother who is being held by Hades (Steve Coogan) accompanied by Grover and Annabeth with the help of Herme's son Luke (Jake Abel).  This and more happens in about the first 15 minutes and I haven't even talked about the exposition scene with Zeus (Sean Bean) and Poseidon (Kevin McKidd), his mother's (Catherine Keener) death, his step father's (Joe Pantoliano) disgustingness, the minotaur, the fury, the car chase, sword fights, capture the flag and Percy's revelation of his heritage and powers.  The book dragged these things out excruciatingly, keeping the extremely obvious a secret with blatant hints that made you scream "I get it already!" but the movie blazes through all set up so fast that any scene that could have developed any character at all or given any sort of logic to the proceedings is lost.

It's a hard to figure out how such an all star cast, which also includes Uma Thurman as Medusa and Rosario Dawson as Persephone, got involved in such a stinker.  I can only imagine that "Harry Potter" was thrown around a lot.  As in, "this is the next Harry Potter," and " Chris Columbus directed a Harry Potter movie too!"  I was not that impressed with the book, though I thought the ideas had promise.  The movie ignored much of the book, but not in a good way.  It changed things that mattered as well as random other things for seemingly no reason.  Entire parts of the quest are cut out and a new scene involving the Parthenon is added in.  I assume the writers didn't want to waste a perfectly good free set in Nashville.  I realize that the characters have been aged a bit to make it seem like less of a kid movie, but even if they are a bit older than their 12 year old literature counterparts, does casting a 26 year old in the role make any sense?  All of the actors are way older than their characters.  There is just about zero character development, and the acting from even experienced players is like mushy cardboard.

One thing that I was impressed with was the sword play.  Too bad Percy was supposed to suck at using a sword instead of being instantly awesome with no training whatsoever.


There is one demographic that will enjoy this movie.  Very young children who like fantasy action, could care less about the plot, and have not read the book.  This joins the likes of Eragon and City of Ember as one of the worst book to movie adaptations ever.


*(1/5 stars)

Brothers

Based on the Danish film Brødre and borrowing from Homer's Odyssey, Brothers stars  Tobey Maguire and Jake Gyllenhaal as very believable brothers Sam and Tommy.  Sam is the all American war hero while Tommy is the black sheep screw up of the family.

The story opens with Tommy being released from prison just as Sam is leaving to return to Afghanistan as a captain in the Marines.  When the news comes that Sam is missing in action and presumed dead, his wife Grace (Natalie Portman) and children (Bailee Madison and Taylor Grace Geare) are devastated.  Finding new purpose and redemption, Tommy steps up to support the grieving family who quickly rely on his new strength.  Things get complicated when Sam is not dead.

The film has a small budget indie vibe to it with that slice of life flavor.  The actors all do a tremendous job.  Gyllenhaal fills out his character quite nicely, growing with Tommy in a very believable way.  Maguire follows in the footsteps of Elijah Wood, making the transition from diminutive hero to massively messed up dude ala The Lord of the Rings to Sin City.  Portman continues to show she excels in anything not involving George Lucas.

It's not the first time a movie has explored the cost of war from this - the returning soldiers and their families - angle, but it does it well.  It's a little slow at times and the trailers resulted in it being a bit predictable since many of the plot points have already been given away.  Having been done before, a little slow and predictable prevent this film from really shining in a way that is worthy of the performances given.  Granted, it's a little hard to take Peter Parker seriously in this kind of role, but that's my problem.

The drama here both tries to replace and overpowers the substance making this an average film with above average performances.  To sum up - award worthy acting, mildly forgettable screenplay, decent drama.

*** (3/5 stars)

Hot Tub Time Machine

When this movie was hailed as this year's The Hangover, I did not see that as a good thing.  Much to my surprise, Hot Tub Time Machine proved to be much funnier and infinitely more intelligent than the former.  Not that it's a smart people movie, but really, with a name like Hot Tub Time Machine the bar is not set all that high.

Unexpectedly starring John Cusack along with Clark Duke, Craig Robinson, and Rob Corddry, it also features Chevy Chase, Crispin Glover, and The Middle's Charlie McDermott.

Lou (Corddry) has a sucky life and tries (for what is apparently not the first time) to commit suicide.  In a bid to cheer him up, his old friends Adam (Cusack) and Nick (Webber), along with Adam's nephew Jacob (Duke), (all of whose lives suck also) show up to take him on a road trip to Kodiak Valley Ski Resort where they had some of their best times as kids.  Thing is, Kodiak Valley isn't the hopping place it used to be.  It's ok though because after a night of drunken partying in a mysterious hot tub, mixed in with a strange and illegal energy drink, the group finds them whisked back to the 80's, at the height of Kodiak Valley's party days, and - as far as anyone else can tell - in their younger bodies.  A squirrel is somehow involved.

Events play out more or less predictably as the butterfly effect is discussed and the four friends try to decide between making sure they don't destroy history and changing their futures for the better.  Jacob is especially concerned about these things, seeing as he isn't even born yet at this point in history.

There are some genuinely funny moments, not the least of which being any scene involving Phil the bellhop (Glover).  Admittedly, pretty much any movie involving time travel already has my interest, but Hot Tub Time Machine is actually pretty decent.  There is actually a plot and there even seems to have been some thought put into it.  It's rather clever (in a somewhat juvenile fashion) at times, and is not quite as raunchy as the title might suggest - though still certainly deserving of it's R rating. 

If you like time travel and don't mind some dirty humour, Hot Tub Time Machine is worth a few hearty chuckles.

*** (3/5 stars)

The Cat Returns

A non-Miyazaki film from Studio Ghibli, The Cat Returns makes more sense, in the sense of a straightforward plot, than many of their films, but is delightfully strange all the same.  The title may seem confusing as it is in reference to the character of The Baron returning to the screen after having been introduced in a previous Ghibli film, Whisper of the Heart.  There is nothing to do with a cat returning in this movie.

All of the Disney adapted Studio Ghibli films have well known voice talent attached to them, but none, I think, is cast as superbly as this.  Starring Anne Hathaway, Cary Elwes, Peter Boyle, Elliott Gould, Tim Curry, and Andy Richter, they all fit their characters perfectly.  Judy Greer, Kristine Sutherland, and Kristen Bell also make appearances.

Haru (Hathaway) is a slightly awkward, frazzled high school girl who saves an odd looking cat from a messy fate in the middle of a busy street.  It turns out that cat just happened to be the Cat Prince, Lune (Andrew Bevis) of the Cat Kingdom and Haru is in for a slew of unexpected, and unwanted, rewards.  Not the least being the prince's hand in marriage.  As she tumbles further down the rabbit hole, Haru finds a number of new friends as well as new enemies as she tries to avoid becoming a permanent resident of the Cat Kingdom.  She meets The Baron (Elwes), a dapper cat figurine come to life; Muta (Boyle), a huge, hungry, and perpetually grumpy white cat; Toto (Gould), a raven statue come to life who is Muta's equally cynical friend; The crazy Cat King (Curry); and Natoru (Richter), the King's eager messenger.

As I mentioned, despite the odd sounding plot, it is actually more or less straightforward with an almost painfully obvious moral of being true to yourself.  This is the one thing that detracts a bit from this animated classic, as there are few cleverly crafted surprises as you would expect from, say, Miyazaki.  Even so, there are wonderful characters, and it is delightfully imaginative.  The mannerisms of cats are captured perfectly, even as they are given human characteristics as well.  This is definitely a must see for any fan of anime or cats.

**** (4/5 stars)

Diary of a Wimpy Kid

Diary of a Wimpy Kid, based on the first book of Jeff Kinney's illustrated novel series, is a partially animated journalistic account of middle school.

The film version of Kinney's book stars Zachary Gordon as 11 year old Greg Heffley who is just about to start middle school with his dorky best friend Rowley (Robert Capron).  Despite his older brother Rodrick's (Devon Bostick) warnings that he will get eaten alive by the experience, Greg is confident that he will quickly rise to the top of the food chain with ease.  He is concerned, however, that Rowley's uncool tendencies may make the task more difficult.  Steve Zahn appears randomly as Mr. Heffley and Chloë Moretz - somehow looking much older than she does in Kick-Ass - is a movie-only wizened 7th grader.

Having not read the books, which are apparently quite popular with kids these days, I can't make any comparisons, but the movie does seem to keep up the whole journal aspect complete with humourous sketches.  The whole thing is pretty much one big lesson on being yourself / not caring what others think of you.  Greg tries so hard to avoid embarrassment that it is embarrassing in and of itself.  Having been homeschooled I didn't have the whole middle school experience but something tells me that I didn't miss much, especially if this film is at all representative in its obviously (?) exaggerated portrayal.

The kid actors are all superb, which is a good thing since 95% of screen time is with them.  Moretz seems a little thrown in there, which her character was, but I would have liked to see more of her anyway.  There were some random bits of CG that felt a bit out of place - like the infamous cheese - and I think it could have worked better perhaps as drawings.

Diary of a Wimpy kid is a nice kid's movie that reminds me a bit of a live action version of Disney's Recess, though not quite as clever.  While cute, this movie will probably appeal mostly to the young fans of the books more than any other demographic.

*** (3/5 stars)

Cop Out

Originally titled "A Couple of Dicks," this Kevin Smith directed entry into the vast catalog of buddy cop movies reverted to what can only be described as a self referential title, Cop Out, after negative reactions to the first choice.

Cop Out stars Bruce Willis in one of his more childish roles as James "Jimmy" Monroe and Tracy Morgan as Tracy Morgan Paul Hodges, a couple of dickish cops who have been partners for 9 years and friends for longer.  Both have been suspended without pay for screwing things up once again.  This is a problem for Jimmy since his daughter (Michelle Trachtenberg) is getting married soon and he doesn't want his wife's (Franice Swift) new husband (Jason Lee) swooping in to front the dream wedding sized bill.  Desperate for cash, Jimmy determines to sell off a valuable baseball card.  As luck would have it, a more than slightly loony guy named Dave (Seann William Scott) decides to rob the hobby store at the same moment.  This sets off a whole chain of unlikely events that has Jimmy and Paul running all around town, getting mixed up with a drug lord's daughter (Ana de la Reguera), and ending up involved in the very case they were suspended for messing up at the beginning of the film.

Cop Out is half homage to and half parody of the genre as makes fun of it but in a mostly affectionate manner.  It's not often that you see Bruce Willis perform crude humour and there's something a bit off about that.  Somehow he does manage, however, to make Tracy Morgan's typical annoying character more bearable.  He really is the film's saving grace, with a little help from Seann William Scott.  There's nothing really new to be seen here otherwise.  Morgan is nearly incomprehensible half the time, but he's not usually saying anything that probably needs to be heard anyway - most of his dialogue seems to be poop jokes, random movie quotes, or him worrying that his wife is cheating on him.  On a side note, if I was a cop, I might be somewhat offended by this movie as it portrays the entire police force as being moronic imbeciles, including the stars.

I enjoyed this one more than the last similar film I watched, Bad Boys, but find it hard to give it any higher of a rating because it really wasn't that great either.  I had fun watching it, but I can have fun watching a bunch of idiots hurting themselves on Fail Blog also - it doesn't make it a well made movie.  I did enjoy the very diverse soundtrack chosen for the movie which is all over the place in terms of style.  It kind of works though.

I don't really have much else to say - I guess it didn't leave that big of an impression on me.

*** (3/5 stars)

Repo Men

Repo Men is a semi-dystopian future sci-fi tale starring Jude Law and Forest Whitaker.  Alice Braga, Liev Schreiber, and John Leguizamo also make appearances.  It is based on the novel Repossession Mambo by Eric Garcia, though there is some controversy as to whether both were not a rip off of the stage show and limited release B movie, Repo! The Genetic Opera.

I call this a semi-dystopian film because overall the world doesn't seem to be any worse than it is today but for the fact that many people make the choice to live, in exchange for constant debt and fear.  Artificial organs have progressed to a point where not only can they replace any part of a person's body, they can actually enhance it.  Anyone at all can purchase these organs to save, extend, or enhance their life.  They're incredibly expensive, but no worries - you can always use a flexible installment plan.  The catch is, if you fall behind on payments, The Union reclaims their property, almost certainly leaving you dead, or at least mutilated.  That's where Remy (Law) and Jake (Whitaker) come in.  They are company repo men, searching out those who are behind on their bills and reclaiming company property.  All is going more or less fine until an accident has Remy in a coma and in need of a new heart.  Waking up in the other side's shoes, he has a sudden twinge of guilt and is unable to perform his normal duties.  Unfortunately that means that he has no income and no way to pay off his debt.  Soon he's on the run with former colleagues - including Jake - after him.

Watching the unrated version this is a lot of violence and gore, though I can't imagine the theatrical release was much less visually stimulating.  This is a movie about people ripping out other people's organs, essentially.  It is nearly non-stop action once it gets going and has some fantastic knife fights that had me wanting to see Jude Law take on Christian Bale's character in Equilibrium.  There is also an obvious homage to Oldboy (one of the most disturbing films I've ever seen, but well crafted) that works quite well.  All of the fights were refreshingly choreographed, in a realistic way, rather than relying on the hand held, quick cut action sequences that have especially over run the action genre since Batman Begins.

The story, too, is engaging.  The characters are unique and well played.  It's an interesting story that never fails to keep my attention.  There are a few holes to the story - like why don't company men get a free heart when injured on a job? - but overall it works.  The movie has a certain feel to it that is maintained throughout.  It feels very much like Minority Report mashed up with The Island with a little bit of Grindhouse styling.

How you feel about this movie is largely dependent on how you feel about the ending.  It seems the ending has polarized most viewers and critics with some saying that the ending either saved a bad movie or ruined a good one.  Personally I think the ending worked and served to strengthen a film that started to get a little weak in places in the second half.  But don't take my word for it - Repo Men is worth making up your own mind about.

**** (4/5 stars)

The Road

Adapted from the novel by Cormac McCarthy, The Road stars Viggo Mortensen as an unnamed man who travels a post-apocalyptic wasteland with his son (Kodi Smit-McPhee) after his wife (Charlize Theron) meets her end.  Robert Duvall and Guy Pearce also make appearances.

There's not much to the plot.  The world has suffered some unnamed disaster and the few people left are either struggling refugees, wandering from place to place in search of food and shelter, or gangs of rednecks cannibals who seem to possess most of resources while steadily declining the number of refugees.  The man and his son have a vague quest to make it to "the coast."

This is not a happy movie, at all.  There are one or two scenes that could fall under that category, but just barely.  Hardly a scene goes by when the young boy is not reminded by his father of the proper way to commit suicide with the ever present gun should he be left alone or cannibals acquire them.  The sun is blocked, apparently by the ash that also litters the ground, and the world is cold and dreary.  Animal life is almost non-existent, and plants have nearly all died.  It's really a desolate place and a desolate film.

The ending is bittersweet, but it is one of the few part of the film that lets any inkling of any kind of hope slip through the cracks.  Overall the film is quite tedious, but not necessarily boring.  It is tedious because the world which it portrays is tedious.  Though it probably works better as a book, Mortensen and McPhee are superb, never breaking from character.  You feel like you are on this hopeless journey with them, which makes you sad.

If you want a well done downer with some intellect, this is the one for you.

*** (3/5 stars)

The Expendables

Written, directed, and starring Sylvester Stallone, The Expendables pays tribute to the action blockbusters of the 80's and 90's featuring actors both from that time as well as newer stars.  In addition to Stallone, the much hyped cast features Dolph Lundgren, Mickey Rourke, Jet Li, Jason Statham, Terry Crews, Randy Couture, and (Stone Cold)Steve Austin, Gary Daniels, and Eric Roberts.  Bruce Willis and Arnold Schwarzenegger also make cameos.

Barney Ross (Stallone) is the leader of a group of elite mercenaries made up of Lee Christmas (Statham), Yin Yang (Li), Toll Road (Couture), Gunnar Jensen (Lundgren), Hale Caesar (Crews), and Tool (Rourke).  After taking out a group of pirates, a very lucrative suicide mission presents itself in the form of Mr. Church (Willis).  Too busy to take on the mission, Trench (Schwarzenegger) declines, leaving Stallone and his team to fly to the island of Vilena (oh, I see what you did there!) to overthrow the dictator, General Garza (David Zayas).  Once there, Ross is immediately enthralled with their contact, a beautiful woman by the name of Sandra (Gisele Itié).  Things progressive in pretty typical action fashion with some pointing out many plot similarities to Rambo.  Not that there's all that many plot points other than blow up the bad guys and save the day.

Despite all those interesting character names, this movie is about the stars, starring the stars, and not the characters they might be pretending to portray.  This is one big macho fest of action heroes doing what they do best.  Despite this, somehow I wish there was more.  There is plenty of action, but it lacks that extra adrenaline needed to really explode.  What little plot that exists is partially obscured through undecipherable expository mumbles by Stallone who often makes David Duchovny look like a great orator.

I had a fun time watching this action flick, but in the end it wasn't all that great of a movie.  Anyone expecting anything other than a bunch of guys beating each other up for a couple hours should turn around and walk the other way.  There would be nothing wrong with a movie like that except, as I said, for as much star power fueling it, the non-stop action stalls a few too many times.  Fun flick, but mostly forgettable.

*** (3/5 stars)